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Accession number	912L : 2124/1
Transcription	baladay Punch . June 1862 . JAPAN AT EPSOM . ( From TAKE - NO - OUICHI - SKIMOD - ZUKE - NO - KAMI , & c . & c . , Japanese Envoy Extraordinary , to the Head Daimio of the Department for Correspondence touching the Barbarians . Nagasaki . ) " TRULY these English Barbarians are a wonderful people . We have already seen the houses and feasts of their Daimios , their Parliament , or national talking - house , their great Exhibition , their Woolwich , their wax - works , their garden of wild animals , their coal - pits , and their manufactories , and we are indeed very weary , and long much for the time when we shall return to our beloved Japan . But we had not yet seen the strangest of all the strange sights here , what may indeed be called the day of the going forth of the people of London - the feast of " Dar - bee is the name of one of the Great Daimios , the chief of the party opposed to the present Tycoon PAR - MER - STOON . But how this feast comes to be called not after the name of the reigning Tycoon , but of him who is now plotting to get his place and his power from him , we , your humble slaves , cannot explain . But it is the opinion of MATSA DAIRA IWAIMÉ , a man of sagacity and learning , that the feast is in honour of an Ancestor of the living Daimio DAR - BEE , who , according to the religion of the Barbarians being worshipped under the symbol of a horse , is reverenced with processions and races of horses , such as we yesterday beheld . The living Daimio DAR - BEE much loves horses , and races of horses , as we are told by our attendant MACDONALD . " All the Barbarians in their chief town of London are compelled to celebrate this festival , which is held at a place called Ep - sum , seven li distant from the capital , situated among hills , and approached by many high roads . Those who cannot buy or hire horses to carry or draw them thither , are compelled to go on foot , and all the inhabitants of London assemble on the hills of Ep - sum , overlooking a smooth space of green turf , which is an enclosure sacred to the great ancestor DAR BEE , and is guarded by police - men in blue garments . Even the great Tycoon PAR - MER - STOON himself is compelled to take part in these rites , and the Councils of the Nation are closed , that all the Daimios and Counsellors , and all their servants , may go with the Tycoon to the feast of the great ancestor DAR - BEE . " We journeyed in two norimons , drawn each by four horses , wishing to show our respect for the religion of the Barbarians . For all the seven li , the road was full of carriages and horses carrying them that journeyed to the feast . They recited loud prayers and sang odes to the ancestor , and played on musical instruments , like to the straight horns used by sellers of fried fish in Japan , as they moved along in procession . For all the seven li these worshippers showed us much respect , lifting up the fore - finger to the nose , and extending the other fingers outwards , which is their greeting of honour in public , and calling out Hul - loo , cri - kee ! ' meaning , ' Oh , beautiful and wonderful ! ' They lso expressed aloud their admiration of our persons and our garments . Our hats , which I and MATSADAIRA IWAIMÉ wore because of the sun , which shone this day - a circumstance not frequent in the country of England were much praised , and many ( as interpreted to us by MACDONALD ) asked at what place such hats could be purchased ( in the Barbarian language ' Ooo - is - yoor - hatter ? ' ) I bade him ( MACDO NALD ) tell these inquiring Barbarians the name of the merchant in the Street of Hatters at Nagasaki , of whom we purchased our travelling supply of hats , and when I see the Daimio Rus - SOOL , I shall propose to him the opening of a trade in these hats , which the Barbarians so much admire . This will give exceeding satisfaction to the Barbarians , spread our manufactures , and cause great gain to the hat - makers of Japan . Also , observing us to use our nose - papers , many asked us if we had sufficient thereof - the words being in their language , How - are yer - off - for - pa - per ! ' the meaning of which words MACDONALD taught us , telling us to answer in the Barbarian tongue , ' You - bee - blode ! ' which means , Thanks be unto you , O people , we have sufficient for our needs . ' The Barbarian tongue , as your serenity will perceive , is brief , and a few words mean much . " On their way to this feast the crowd stopped at certain small temples by the way - side called ' turn - pike , ' where invocations were uttered in a loud voice , and small pieces of coin given to the priests , doubtless in payment for prayers , or for propitiation of the great ances tor DAR - BEE . At other temples by the way - side meat and drink , offerings were made by the Barbarians . Also priests in ragged mourning garments , with dust upon their heads , and bare - footed , ran by the way - side , with prayers inscribed on papers which they offered to the people for money . Of these prayer - papers we have bought some for deposit in the archives of the department for Correspondence with Barbarians . After awhile , all the people gathered in two rows , with an open green space between them , and a dog was let loose , and the people shouted as if devoting him to the evil powers , to which indeed we believe the unclean animal to have been offered as a sacrifice . Then came forth horses of exceeding height , but more thin than storks or flamingoes , with men on their backs in bright garments , and the people shouted , and the horses galloped up and down like the wind , more and more joining them , till at last , they all disap peared round the hill in front of us , and by the aid of the glasses which make far - off things near , we saw them a mile and a half away . Then of a sudden we heard a bell , and a loud shouting , and the crowd swayed to and fro , and we felt our heads go round by reason of the crying and the multitude , and in two moments after the bell , we heard a great roaring and a great sound of horses ' feet , and behold something rushed before us , but whether it was horses or men , or soldiers , or railway carriages , we knew not , and then the people poured into the green space which they had abstained from till now , and we were told the feast of Dar - bee was over , and there arose a noise as of pistols , and our hearts turned to water , but MACDONALD told us to be of good courage , " We are told that many Daimios give many thousands of taels at this festival to the priests of Dar - bee , who tend and do honour to the sacred horses , who are kept for this curious festival , and that there are many Daimios who keep sacred horses for the feast , such as we had seen , tall and strong and exceeding thin , and men in bright garments to ride upon their backs . But all these things are a mystery to us , and our heads still ache with all we saw and heard that day , though we took many bottles of the Barbarian medicine ' sham - pain ' to cool us , and give strength to our bodies . " Why all the Daimios and the people of all ranks down to the lowest coolies flock to the festival , unless it be that it is enjoined by religion , we cannot tell . The way of seven li is very sore to travel for heat and dust and crowd , and MATSADAIRA IWAIMÉ thinks it is a journey of penance , laid upon the Barbarians by their priests , and I agree that this is probable , though MACDONALD , when we asked , said it was ' sport , ' a word meaning ' play ' or ' pleasure . ' But how there be can play ' or pleasure ' in suspending the Councils of the Nation , and the business of the capital , and journeying seven li , through heat and dust and crowds , to see many tall and thin horses galloping madly for two moments like railway engines that have run away , and in paying many thousand taels to the priests of the horses , neither I nor MATSA DAIRA IWAIMÉ can understand . We believe there is some meaning in this , which the Tycoon does not wish us to fathom . are many things just as difficult of comprehension , about which these Barbarians clearly wish to keep us in the dark . When we inquire , they give us reasons which would not satisfy children , much more men of statecraft and learning . Indeed there " When we came to the place where a seat of honour was prepared for us , we saw that all the Barbarians of London were indeed here assembled . The crowd was as the crowd of flies about the honey - pots in the market of Nuku Haima , and the shouting as the roar of many waters , and the horses and the carriages more than could be counted . And we saw the Tycoon , PAR - MER - STOON , in common garments like other men , with many counsellors of the Mikado and Daimios , and all the Parliament of the nation , in an enclosed place , below where we sat , and many of them had little books in their hands , and they stood in a ring , and wrote in their books , and uttered invocations in a loud voice sounding like ' I - lay - five - to - one , ' ' Six to nine - on - Buck - stone . I - take - it- , ' which we believe to have been prayers or religious exclamations , but they were not clearly explained to us , as indeed one interpreter was not sufficient for the many strange sights we saw that day : for it was the corks of the wholesome medicinal drink called by the Barbarians sham - pain , ' of which we have often drunk , for it is good for the stomach in this country . Then all the multitude took food , and the means of spreading it out before them from their carriages , and drink , and began eating and drinking much in honour of ' Dar - bee , ' for this is a part of the festival which must on no account be omitted . " Of all their strange things , certainly , the feast of ' Dar - bee ' is the most strange . What passed on our road home is little known to me . The medicine sham - pain , among other qualities , causeth sleep to descend on the eyes , and I think I slept , for when I next remember , I was in my bed in the Yamun of Claridge , and my head ached exceedingly by reason of the much thought I had given to the strange things of this day . " LA LÉGENDE DU FACTEUR Air des Feuilles mortes . Ecoutez le récit d'une bien triste affaire ! ... Un modeste piéton , simple facteur rural , Aimait éperdûment une jeune vachère Et voulait l'épouser , - car il était moral ! La vachère de lui faisait des amusettes : Elle lui préférait un tendre et beau sapeur ... Quand vous passerez par Trépagny les Chaussettes , Chacun vous parlera des amours du facteur . - Il était , il est vrai , d'une laideur extrême ; Il transpirait des pieds ( 1 ) , mais il n'y pouvait rien ; C'était là son malheur , il le sentait lui - même : Excepté ça , chacun de lui disait du bien .... Ses distributions étaient toujours bien faites ; Et s'il suait des pieds , c'est qu ' c'était un marcheur . Aussi , les habitants d ' Trépagny les Chaussettes Plaignaient , mais n ' blamaient pas le malheureux facteur . 1 La vachèr ' n'était pas non plus la beauté même ; C'était un gros laidron aux regards bébêtés , Joignant à sa laideur une sottise extrême ... Cependant elle avait aussi des qualités : Rien qu'en s'asseyant d ' ssus ell ' cassait des noisettes Et broyait des cailloux sous ses talons calleux ... Quand vous passerez par Trépagny les Chaussettes , Ils vous parleront tous d ' la vachèr ' de chez eux ! ... Un jour , notre facteur traversait la prairie , Marchant triste , rêveur et sans savoir pourquoi , Quand il voit tout à coup sa vachère chérie , Au pied d'un chataignier , s'occupant ... mais à quoi ? Il la croyait en train de cueillir des violettes ... Pas du tout ! Ell ' causait avec son beau sapeur ... Quand vous passerez par Trépagny les Chaussettes , Chacun vous parlera de l'affair ' du sapeur . - Le facteur , jusque - là , se doutait de la chose , Une fois convaincu qu'il ne se trompait pas , Soudain à se venger voilà qu'il se dispose ; Des coupabl's et d ' lui - même il jure le trépas . Du poison des Borgia connaissant les recettes , Savez - vous ce que fit le désolé facteur ? Il mit pendant trois jours infuser ses chaussettes Puis il empoisonna lui , la femme et l'sapeur . - La légend ' du facteur a bercé mon enfance .... On la reconte encor loin , bien loin du pays . Tout le monde la sait : voilà pourquoi , je pense , On ajouta « chaussette » au nom de Trépagny . Depuis , l'autorité , par la voix des gazettes , A dit pour éviter de semblables malheurs ; « Désormais , les piétons n'porteront plus d'chaussettes . >> C'est encor ' défendu maintenant aux facteurs . The Prince of Wales , a re leased prisoner of war since yesterday , followed with his 2d cavalry brigade . Sir Thomas M'Mahon , with the 3d cavalry brigade , came next , with his trim 9th Lancers , looking much better than the 12th both in horse and drill . Standard 28th Sept 1871 MEN OF THE SECOND EMPIRE . No. XVII . - THE PRIVATE SOLDIER . AR ago an untoward catastrophe befell Jean Tripou he drew 12 " at the concomin MANNHEIM - BASEL . Eisenbahn Kork Appenweier You Chemin de fer Schweitz Basel Oberkirch Renchen FRANKREICH Achern 12 St. Bühl Steinbach 23 St. les Rastatt Baden Muggensturm Rothenfels Malsch 81 St. Lauterburg Rhein Ettlingen Rhein FRA N n Durlach Carlsruhe Weingarten BAIERN 10 & st . The second letter was to Mdme . Goulot , late Mdlle . Marie Fichu . As before , I have amended the spelling , but this time I have not translated : Madame ( car pour moi vous n'êtes plus Mademoiselle ) , si vous pensez me faire de la Goulot vous vous trompez , je vous assure ; car je me moque pas mal de filles sont folles de moi . Ce n'est pas pour me vanter ; mais seulement elles ont meilleur goût que vous . Hier une duchesse qui passait dans sa l'oeil , et ce matin son frère , qui est maréchal de France m'inviter à diner . Encore une fois ce n'est pas pour vous montrer que j'ai de quoi me consoler . Adieu , entôt ma duchesse , qui m'obtiendra mon congé , et me vous garde pas rancune , mais bien au contraire vous qu oique ce soit un fier imbecile et que si on le ours de salle de police rien que pour être si bête . - Bien JEAN TRIPOU . Bruchsal AFTERNOON PERFORMANCE , Doors open at 3 ; To commence at 3.30 . EVENING PERFORMANCE , Doors open at 9 ; To commence at 9.30 . TICKETS to be obtained at Mr. SHELDRAKE'S . GOD SAVE THE QUEEN ! J. D. MUGGERIDGE , PRINTER , ALDERSHOT . Reserved Seats , 2s.6d . First Seats , 1s.6d . Second Seats , 1s . Available for Soldiers in uniform an 1 their Wives , at 4d . K R E I C H : r . lear Father and Mother , -This is written at Versailles , where the regiment is d . I hope you are quite well . Versailles is a town with a fine castle in which uatorze lived until he was knocked over by the Emperor for being a Republican . present in England with his son the Duke d'Aumale , who used to be in the It is our brigadier ( corporal ) who told me this . He knows a great many things , dier , and he says that as the French soldier should never be without money , ask you for twenty francs ; he is going to show me how to spend them . lon't forget the twenty francs . When I came here I had a lot of hair , but it all off , and made my head look a beechnut . I wanted to pick up all the put it in a paper to burn it because of what you told me about one's enemy ble to do one harm by getting hold of a lock and boiling it , but our brigadier a kick which sent me into the yard . He is very strong in the right leg , our After I had been here five days they gave me ten sous for my pay . I vasn't enough , because that only made two sous a day ; but our captain asked wanted to make a fool of him . I don't like him , our captain . It is he who a the riding - school , where they took me the first day I put on my uniform . ought out a horse without saddle or bridle , and said , " Now get upon that . " I I'd rather not . They said this made no difference , and two of ' em caught me ted me up . The brute of a horse began to trot , and I cried " Stop ! " but he attention until I got hold of his ears , then he kicked me off . The next day , ey told me to go to the " manége " I knew what it meant , so instead of going I t for a walk and didn't come back till dinner . For this they gave me a week in de police , which is a dark room with nothing in it except boards . Please orget the twenty francs . The best of being a soldier is that every ys they give you an order for a packet of " cantine tobacco , " which hundred grammes , and for which you only pay 3 sous . peror who has done this , * and our brigadier says he would do a great deal the " Reds " let him . But the " Reds " hate us ; it is they who make us have eef every day , and no sauce to it ; and our brigadier says that if they could they hake us break stones and set us to serve twenty years instead of nine . I don't Reds , and if I have a chance I shall knock their ears off with my sword . I must a It is e , for the trumpet you've just heard is for dinner . It's a pound of bread , with eef in some soup . Yesterday mine was all fat . Please don't forget the twenty Your affectionate son , JEAN TRIROU . Speier Langenbrüken Philippsburg 12 & st . Wiesloch 42 st . Schwetzingen Mannheim Heidelberg Enedrichsfeld 51 s .. Strasboure Kehterk Appenweier hawk 1867 bt but that the approaching return to of Wales is giving general satisfaction to surprised to hear that , on the Prince's s station , a public reception will be given ession will be formed to accompany His h Trafalgar Square and along Pall Mall The following is the programme as at nt - Colonels of the Guards . To clear the way ) . oyal Italian Opera , Covent Garden . Mr. Poole . ( Of Savile Row ) . of Peers . Friends of his Royal High ( Two and two ) . ness . Prince's Tradesmen . ( In pairs ) . Marlborough Club , carrying a banner vith the motto : There's na lack about the house , When my gude man's awa ' . " Friends of Lord Carington . ( In broughams ) . Band of the Sacred Harmonic Society . onductor - Sir Michael Costa ( on horseback ) . ROYAL HIGHNESS THE PRINCE OF WALES , ng carriage ( kindly lent by the Metropolitan Railway y ) , and drawn by the four principal favourites for the Derby . achment of Fire Engines , under the direction of the Duke of Sutherland . ers of the Guards . Committeemen of the Arlington , ards of the Jockey Club . Mr. Arthur Lloyd . The Archbishop of Canterbury , & c . , & c . CITO Pelham Clinton has discovered a new way of outrunning He has just earned £ 50 for his creditors by walking ten rs at Hackney Wick , in the presence of " a select circle of d , we learn from a fashionable contemporary , " no pre oncepfold . Old Fichu had got his gun ready , and albeit it was he walked the distance within three minutes of the prescribed time . " Loud tensions to style , his feet coming down flat and heavily at every stride , " but lock yet Tripou grew shy at the look of it . Within the week he hat Marie had been seen to smile benevolently upon Pierre Goulot , accomplished solely by great gameness . " His lordship certainly deserves cheers greeted the pedestrian at the termination of the feat , which was keeper , who was a widower , but yet hale and lusty . every encouragement in his ambition to be considered fast in a different sense from that in which the adjective has hitherto been applied to his debts , and if matches fail , Lord Hartington might " stand by his order " career . By his earnings as a pedestrian he may in time pay off his clearly preferable to that of Lord William Beresford , of the 9th Lancers , and find employment for him as a postman . Lord Albert's " gameness " is who has been fined £ 5 for creating a disturbance at midnight in a beer shop in Roehampton - lane and assaulting the police . This news him . He packed up all his linen in a pocket - handkerchief , bid ye to his parents , and without waiting for the month of July started the army , selecting as his regiment the cuirassiers , most likely on t of the helmet and breastplate . ree months afterwards the two following letters were received in his The first was to his parents in translation I have mended the : Call Mall Gagette 3t . May 1871 . The Era has discovered in a Spanish newspaper , the Porvenar di Seville , a very original account of the Oxford and Cambridge boat - race , which , the Spaniards are told , " commences at Westminster , by the Houses of Parliament , and takes its course up the grand river to the parks of Greenwich and Richmond . " The regattas of London are , " with the races of Epsom and Derby , " the great feasts of the year . This year the river , on the occasion of the Oxford and Cambridge boat - race , is said to have been crowded with two thousand steamers , " at the head of which sailed the Prince of Wales in a small boat " with thirty distinguished persons . " While the race was going on bands of music paraded the streets , " some with black faces . " " A cannon from the Tower announced the victor . After the regatta , 100,000 restaurants were opened to the public , who crowded into them to drink their beer . In the villas in the vicinity of the race dinners were given to all Cambridge people to the number of several thousands , the young people afterwards enjoying the ball . " Hans 9th Jept . 18710 The Reason Why . EVERYBODY has endeavoured to discover the cause of the sudden abandonment of the Berkshire Campaign by the War Office authori ties . We are happy to be in a position to lay before the public the solution of the unexpected change . We extract the following notice from the Aldershot and Sandhurst Military Gazette : Private W. T- of the 9th Lancers , is open to eat cheese bread , sausages , pickles , herrings , potted beef , pigs feet , tripe , beef steak , hum , potatoes , bacon , green goose berries , Yorkshire pudding , cold cabbage , and lard , against any man in the Alder shot Division . A match can be made at any time for £ 1 or upwards by applying to Private SH , F Troop , 9th Lancers , South Cavalry Barracks . No wonder in the face of an appetite at which the best regulated Commissariat might turn pale , MB . CARDWELL at once abandoned the plan ! But there is this compensating fact in this alarming announce ment : -if among our gallant defenders there are many privates with such powers of eating as this one , we could soon reduce any enemy into whose country we could introduce a few voracious veterans of this stamp .

Accession number

912L : 2124/1

Transcription

baladay
Punch .
June 1862 .
JAPAN AT EPSOM .
( From TAKE - NO - OUICHI - SKIMOD - ZUKE - NO - KAMI , & c . & c . , Japanese Envoy Extraordinary , to the Head Daimio of the Department for Correspondence touching the Barbarians . Nagasaki . ) " TRULY these English Barbarians are a wonderful people . We have already seen the houses and feasts of their Daimios , their Parliament , or national talking - house , their great Exhibition , their Woolwich , their wax - works , their garden of wild animals , their coal - pits , and their manufactories , and we are indeed very weary , and long much for the time when we shall return to our beloved Japan . But we had not yet seen the strangest of all the strange sights here , what may indeed be called the day of the going forth of the people of London - the feast
of
" Dar - bee is the name of one of the Great Daimios , the chief of the party opposed to the present Tycoon PAR - MER - STOON . But how this feast comes to be called not after the name of the reigning Tycoon , but of him who is now plotting to get his place and his power from him , we , your humble slaves , cannot explain . But it is the opinion of MATSA DAIRA IWAIMÉ , a man of sagacity and learning , that the feast is in honour of an Ancestor of the living Daimio DAR - BEE , who , according to the religion of the Barbarians being worshipped under the symbol of a horse , is reverenced with processions and races of horses , such as we yesterday beheld . The living Daimio DAR - BEE much loves horses , and races of horses , as we are told by our attendant MACDONALD .
" All the Barbarians in their chief town of London are compelled to celebrate this festival , which is held at a place called Ep - sum , seven li distant from the capital , situated among hills , and approached by many high roads . Those who cannot buy or hire horses to carry or draw them thither , are compelled to go on foot , and all the inhabitants of London assemble on the hills of Ep - sum , overlooking a smooth space of green turf , which is an enclosure sacred to the great ancestor DAR BEE , and is guarded by police - men in blue garments . Even the great Tycoon PAR - MER - STOON himself is compelled to take part in these rites , and the Councils of the Nation are closed , that all the Daimios and Counsellors , and all their servants , may go with the Tycoon to the feast of the great ancestor DAR - BEE .
" We journeyed in two norimons , drawn each by four horses , wishing to show our respect for the religion of the Barbarians . For all the seven li , the road was full of carriages and horses carrying them that journeyed to the feast . They recited loud prayers and sang odes to the ancestor , and played on musical instruments , like to the straight horns used by sellers of fried fish in Japan , as they moved along in procession . For all the seven li these worshippers showed us much respect , lifting up the fore - finger to the nose , and extending the other fingers outwards , which is their greeting of honour in public , and calling out Hul - loo , cri - kee ! ' meaning , ' Oh , beautiful and wonderful ! ' They lso expressed aloud their admiration of our persons and our garments . Our hats , which I and MATSADAIRA IWAIMÉ wore because of the sun , which shone this day - a circumstance not frequent in the country of England were much praised , and many ( as interpreted to us by MACDONALD ) asked at what place such hats could be purchased ( in the Barbarian language ' Ooo - is - yoor - hatter ? ' ) I bade him ( MACDO NALD ) tell these inquiring Barbarians the name of the merchant in the Street of Hatters at Nagasaki , of whom we purchased our travelling supply of hats , and when I see the Daimio Rus - SOOL , I shall propose to him the opening of a trade in these hats , which the Barbarians so much admire . This will give exceeding satisfaction to the Barbarians , spread our manufactures , and cause great gain to the hat - makers of Japan . Also , observing us to use our nose - papers , many asked us if we had sufficient thereof - the words being in their language , How - are yer - off - for - pa - per ! ' the meaning of which words MACDONALD taught us , telling us to answer in the Barbarian tongue , ' You - bee - blode ! ' which means , Thanks be unto you , O people , we have sufficient for our needs . ' The Barbarian tongue , as your serenity will perceive , is brief , and a few words mean much .
" On their way to this feast the crowd stopped at certain small temples by the way - side called ' turn - pike , ' where invocations were uttered in a loud voice , and small pieces of coin given to the priests , doubtless in payment for prayers , or for propitiation of the great ances tor DAR - BEE . At other temples by the way - side meat and drink , offerings were made by the Barbarians . Also priests in ragged mourning garments , with dust upon their heads , and bare - footed , ran by the way - side , with prayers inscribed on papers which they offered to the people for money . Of these prayer - papers we have bought some for deposit in the archives of the department for Correspondence with Barbarians .
After awhile , all the people gathered in two rows , with an open green space between them , and a dog was let loose , and the people shouted as if devoting him to the evil powers , to which indeed we believe the unclean animal to have been offered as a sacrifice . Then came forth horses of exceeding height , but more thin than storks or flamingoes , with men on their backs in bright garments , and the people shouted , and the horses galloped up and down like the wind , more and more joining them , till at last , they all disap peared round the hill in front of us , and by the aid of the glasses which make far - off things near , we saw them a mile and a half away . Then of a sudden we heard a bell , and a loud shouting , and the crowd swayed to and fro , and we felt our heads go round by reason of the crying and the multitude , and in two moments after the bell , we heard a great roaring and a great sound of horses ' feet , and behold something rushed before us , but whether it was horses or men , or soldiers , or railway carriages , we knew not , and then the people poured into the green space which they had abstained from till now , and we were told the feast of Dar - bee was over , and there arose a noise as of pistols , and our hearts turned to water , but MACDONALD told us to be of good courage ,
" We are told that many Daimios give many thousands of taels at this festival to the priests of Dar - bee , who tend and do honour to the sacred horses , who are kept for this curious festival , and that there are many Daimios who keep sacred horses for the feast , such as we had seen , tall and strong and exceeding thin , and men in bright garments to ride upon their backs . But all these things are a mystery to us , and our heads still ache with all we saw and heard that day , though we took many bottles of the Barbarian medicine ' sham - pain ' to cool us , and give strength to our bodies .
" Why all the Daimios and the people of all ranks down to the lowest coolies flock to the festival , unless it be that it is enjoined by religion , we cannot tell . The way of seven li is very sore to travel for heat and dust and crowd , and MATSADAIRA IWAIMÉ thinks it is a journey of penance , laid upon the Barbarians by their priests , and I agree that this is probable , though MACDONALD , when we asked , said it was ' sport , ' a word meaning ' play ' or ' pleasure . ' But how there be
can
play ' or pleasure ' in suspending the Councils of the Nation , and the business of the capital , and journeying seven li , through heat and dust and crowds , to see many tall and thin horses galloping madly for two moments like railway engines that have run away , and in paying many thousand taels to the priests of the horses , neither I nor MATSA DAIRA IWAIMÉ can understand . We believe there is some meaning in this , which the Tycoon does not wish us to fathom . are many things just as difficult of comprehension , about which these Barbarians clearly wish to keep us in the dark . When we inquire , they give us reasons which would not satisfy children , much more men of statecraft and learning .
Indeed there
" When we came to the place where a seat of honour was prepared for us , we saw that all the Barbarians of London were indeed here assembled . The crowd was as the crowd of flies about the honey - pots in the market of Nuku Haima , and the shouting as the roar of many waters , and the horses and the carriages more than could be counted . And we saw the Tycoon , PAR - MER - STOON , in common garments like other men , with many counsellors of the Mikado and Daimios , and all the Parliament of the nation , in an enclosed place , below where we sat , and many of them had little books in their hands , and they stood in a ring , and wrote in their books , and uttered invocations in a loud voice sounding like ' I - lay - five - to - one , ' ' Six to nine - on - Buck - stone . I - take - it- , ' which we believe to have been prayers or religious exclamations , but they were not clearly explained to us , as indeed one interpreter was not sufficient for the many strange sights we saw that
day :
for it was the corks of the wholesome medicinal drink called by the Barbarians sham - pain , ' of which we have often drunk , for it is good for the stomach in this country . Then all the multitude took food , and the means of spreading it out before them from their carriages , and drink , and began eating and drinking much in honour of ' Dar - bee , ' for this is a part of the festival which must on no account be omitted .
" Of all their strange things , certainly , the feast of ' Dar - bee ' is the most strange . What passed on our road home is little known to me . The medicine sham - pain , among other qualities , causeth sleep to descend on the eyes , and I think I slept , for when I next remember , I was in my bed in the Yamun of Claridge , and my head ached exceedingly by reason of the much thought I had given to the strange things of this day . "
LA LÉGENDE DU FACTEUR
Air des Feuilles mortes .
Ecoutez le récit d'une bien triste affaire ! ... Un modeste piéton , simple facteur rural ,
Aimait éperdûment une jeune vachère Et voulait l'épouser , - car il était moral ! La vachère de lui faisait des amusettes : Elle lui préférait un tendre et beau sapeur ... Quand vous passerez par Trépagny les Chaussettes , Chacun vous parlera des amours du facteur .
-
Il était , il est vrai , d'une laideur extrême ; Il transpirait des pieds ( 1 ) , mais il n'y pouvait rien ; C'était là son malheur , il le sentait lui - même : Excepté ça , chacun de lui disait du bien ....
Ses distributions étaient toujours bien faites ; Et s'il suait des pieds , c'est qu ' c'était un marcheur . Aussi , les habitants d ' Trépagny les Chaussettes Plaignaient , mais n ' blamaient pas le malheureux facteur .
1
La vachèr ' n'était pas non plus la beauté même ; C'était un gros laidron aux regards bébêtés , Joignant à sa laideur une sottise extrême ... Cependant elle avait aussi des qualités :
Rien qu'en s'asseyant d ' ssus ell ' cassait des noisettes Et broyait des cailloux sous ses talons calleux ... Quand vous passerez par Trépagny les Chaussettes , Ils vous parleront tous d ' la vachèr ' de chez eux ! ...
Un jour , notre facteur traversait la prairie , Marchant triste , rêveur et sans savoir pourquoi , Quand il voit tout à coup sa vachère chérie , Au pied d'un chataignier , s'occupant ... mais à quoi ? Il la croyait en train de cueillir des violettes ...
Pas du tout ! Ell ' causait avec son beau sapeur ... Quand vous passerez par Trépagny les Chaussettes , Chacun vous parlera de l'affair ' du sapeur .
-
Le facteur , jusque - là , se doutait de la chose , Une fois convaincu qu'il ne se trompait pas , Soudain à se venger voilà qu'il se dispose ; Des coupabl's et d ' lui - même il jure le trépas . Du poison des Borgia connaissant les recettes , Savez - vous ce que fit le désolé facteur ?
Il mit pendant trois jours infuser ses chaussettes Puis il empoisonna lui , la femme et l'sapeur .
-
La légend ' du facteur a bercé mon enfance .... On la reconte encor loin , bien loin du pays . Tout le monde la sait : voilà pourquoi , je pense , On ajouta « chaussette » au nom de Trépagny . Depuis , l'autorité , par la voix des gazettes , A dit pour éviter de semblables malheurs ; « Désormais , les piétons n'porteront plus d'chaussettes . >> C'est encor ' défendu maintenant aux facteurs .
The Prince of Wales , a re leased prisoner of war since yesterday , followed with his 2d cavalry brigade . Sir Thomas M'Mahon , with the 3d cavalry brigade , came next , with his trim 9th Lancers , looking much better than the 12th both in horse and drill .
Standard 28th Sept 1871
MEN OF THE SECOND EMPIRE .
No. XVII . - THE PRIVATE SOLDIER . AR ago an untoward catastrophe befell Jean Tripou he drew
12 " at the concomin
MANNHEIM - BASEL .
Eisenbahn Kork Appenweier You
Chemin de fer
Schweitz
Basel
Oberkirch
Renchen
FRANKREICH
Achern
12 St.
Bühl
Steinbach
23 St.
les
Rastatt
Baden
Muggensturm Rothenfels Malsch
81 St.
Lauterburg
Rhein
Ettlingen
Rhein
FRA N
n
Durlach
Carlsruhe
Weingarten
BAIERN
10 & st .
The second letter was to Mdme . Goulot , late Mdlle . Marie Fichu . As before , I have amended the spelling , but this time I have not translated : Madame ( car pour moi vous n'êtes plus Mademoiselle ) , si vous pensez me faire de la Goulot vous vous trompez , je vous assure ; car je me moque pas mal de filles sont folles de moi . Ce n'est pas pour me vanter ; mais seulement elles ont meilleur goût que vous . Hier une duchesse qui passait dans sa
l'oeil , et ce matin son frère , qui est maréchal de France m'inviter à diner . Encore une fois ce n'est pas pour vous montrer que j'ai de quoi me consoler . Adieu , entôt ma duchesse , qui m'obtiendra mon congé , et me vous garde pas rancune , mais bien au contraire vous qu oique ce soit un fier imbecile et que si on le ours de salle de police rien que pour être si bête . - Bien JEAN TRIPOU .
Bruchsal
AFTERNOON PERFORMANCE ,
Doors open at 3 ; To commence at 3.30 . EVENING PERFORMANCE , Doors open at 9 ; To commence at 9.30 .
TICKETS to be obtained at Mr. SHELDRAKE'S .
GOD SAVE THE QUEEN !
J. D. MUGGERIDGE , PRINTER , ALDERSHOT .
Reserved Seats , 2s.6d . First Seats , 1s.6d . Second Seats , 1s . Available for Soldiers in uniform an 1 their Wives , at 4d .
K R E I C H
:
r .
lear Father and Mother , -This is written at Versailles , where the regiment is d . I hope you are quite well . Versailles is a town with a fine castle in which uatorze lived until he was knocked over by the Emperor for being a Republican . present in England with his son the Duke d'Aumale , who used to be in the It is our brigadier ( corporal ) who told me this . He knows a great many things , dier , and he says that as the French soldier should never be without money , ask you for twenty francs ; he is going to show me how to spend them . lon't forget the twenty francs . When I came here I had a lot of hair , but it all off , and made my head look a beechnut . I wanted to pick up all the put it in a paper to burn it because of what you told me about one's enemy ble to do one harm by getting hold of a lock and boiling it , but our brigadier a kick which sent me into the yard . He is very strong in the right leg , our After I had been here five days they gave me ten sous for my pay . I vasn't enough , because that only made two sous a day ; but our captain asked wanted to make a fool of him . I don't like him , our captain . It is he who a the riding - school , where they took me the first day I put on my uniform . ought out a horse without saddle or bridle , and said , " Now get upon that . " I I'd rather not . They said this made no difference , and two of ' em caught me ted me up . The brute of a horse began to trot , and I cried " Stop ! " but he attention until I got hold of his ears , then he kicked me off . The next day , ey told me to go to the " manége " I knew what it meant , so instead of going I t for a walk and didn't come back till dinner . For this they gave me a week in de police , which is a dark room with nothing in it except boards . Please orget the twenty francs . The best of being a soldier is that every ys they give you an order for a packet of " cantine tobacco , " which hundred grammes , and for which you only pay 3 sous . peror who has done this , * and our brigadier says he would do a great deal the " Reds " let him . But the " Reds " hate us ; it is they who make us have eef every day , and no sauce to it ; and our brigadier says that if they could they hake us break stones and set us to serve twenty years instead of nine . I don't Reds , and if I have a chance I shall knock their ears off with my sword . I must
a
It is
e , for the trumpet you've just heard is for dinner . It's a pound of bread , with eef in some soup . Yesterday mine was all fat . Please don't forget the twenty Your affectionate son , JEAN TRIROU .
Speier
Langenbrüken Philippsburg
12 & st .
Wiesloch
42 st .
Schwetzingen
Mannheim
Heidelberg
Enedrichsfeld
51 s ..
Strasboure Kehterk
Appenweier
hawk
1867
bt but that the approaching return to of Wales is giving general satisfaction to surprised to hear that , on the Prince's s station , a public reception will be given ession will be formed to accompany His h Trafalgar Square and along Pall Mall The following is the programme as at
nt - Colonels of the Guards . To clear the way ) .
oyal Italian Opera , Covent Garden . Mr. Poole .
( Of Savile Row ) .
of Peers . Friends of his Royal High ( Two and two ) .
ness .
Prince's Tradesmen . ( In pairs ) .
Marlborough Club , carrying a banner
vith the motto :
There's na lack about the house , When my gude man's awa ' . " Friends of Lord Carington . ( In broughams ) .
Band of the Sacred Harmonic Society . onductor - Sir Michael Costa ( on horseback ) . ROYAL HIGHNESS THE PRINCE OF WALES , ng carriage ( kindly lent by the Metropolitan Railway y ) , and drawn by the four principal favourites for the Derby .
achment of Fire Engines , under the direction of the Duke of Sutherland .
ers of the Guards . Committeemen of the Arlington , ards of the Jockey Club . Mr. Arthur Lloyd . The Archbishop of Canterbury , & c . , & c .
CITO
Pelham Clinton has discovered a new way of outrunning He has just earned £ 50 for his creditors by walking ten rs at Hackney Wick , in the presence of " a select circle of d , we learn from a fashionable contemporary , " no pre oncepfold . Old Fichu had got his gun ready , and albeit it was he walked the distance within three minutes of the prescribed time . " Loud tensions to style , his feet coming down flat and heavily at every stride , " but lock yet Tripou grew shy at the look of it . Within the week he hat Marie had been seen to smile benevolently upon Pierre Goulot , accomplished solely by great gameness . " His lordship certainly deserves cheers greeted the pedestrian at the termination of the feat , which was keeper , who was a widower , but yet hale and lusty . every encouragement in his ambition to be considered fast in a different sense from that in which the adjective has hitherto been applied to his debts , and if matches fail , Lord Hartington might " stand by his order " career . By his earnings as a pedestrian he may in time pay off his clearly preferable to that of Lord William Beresford , of the 9th Lancers , and find employment for him as a postman . Lord Albert's " gameness " is who has been fined £ 5 for creating a disturbance at midnight in a beer shop in Roehampton - lane and assaulting the police .
This news him . He packed up all his linen in a pocket - handkerchief , bid ye to his parents , and without waiting for the month of July started the army , selecting as his regiment the cuirassiers , most likely on t of the helmet and breastplate .
ree months afterwards the two following letters were received in his The first was to his parents in translation I have mended the
:
Call Mall Gagette 3t . May 1871 .
The Era has discovered in a Spanish newspaper , the Porvenar di Seville , a very original account of the Oxford and Cambridge boat - race , which , the Spaniards are told , " commences at Westminster , by the Houses of Parliament , and takes its course up the grand river to the parks of Greenwich and Richmond . " The regattas of London are , " with the races of Epsom and Derby , " the great feasts of the year . This year the river , on the occasion of the Oxford and Cambridge boat - race , is said to have been crowded with two thousand steamers , " at the head of which sailed the Prince of Wales in a small boat " with thirty distinguished persons . " While the race was going on bands of music paraded the streets , " some with black faces . " " A cannon from the Tower announced the victor . After the regatta , 100,000 restaurants were opened to the public , who crowded into them to drink their beer . In the villas in the vicinity of the race dinners were given to all Cambridge people to the number of several thousands , the young people afterwards enjoying the ball . "
Hans 9th Jept . 18710 The Reason Why .
EVERYBODY has endeavoured to discover the cause of the sudden abandonment of the Berkshire Campaign by the War Office authori ties . We are happy to be in a position to lay before the public the solution of the unexpected change . We extract the following notice from the Aldershot and Sandhurst Military Gazette :
Private W. T- of the 9th Lancers , is open to eat cheese bread , sausages , pickles , herrings , potted beef , pigs feet , tripe , beef steak , hum , potatoes , bacon , green goose berries , Yorkshire pudding , cold cabbage , and lard , against any man in the Alder shot Division . A match can be made at any time for £ 1 or upwards by applying to Private SH , F Troop , 9th Lancers , South Cavalry Barracks .
No wonder in the face of an appetite at which the best regulated Commissariat might turn pale , MB . CARDWELL at once abandoned the plan ! But there is this compensating fact in this alarming announce ment : -if among our gallant defenders there are many privates with such powers of eating as this one , we could soon reduce any enemy into whose country we could introduce a few voracious veterans of this stamp .

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